so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
