Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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