More tranny stories later!
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
