why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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