Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
This toilet bowl is my home.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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