the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
