i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
