Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
