Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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