you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
