i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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