Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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