Sponge bath it is.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
