I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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