ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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