I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize