what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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