Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
