so explain again why im purple
no
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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