Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
