Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I need to wash the frat house off of me
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.