What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
sex in a hospital.. check
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
