He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
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