i just google imaged poop.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
my liver is dry heaving
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
