Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
