there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
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I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
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Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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