Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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