We're like a lot better than the average bears
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Randomize
