Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
