yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"