Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Sharpest. Poop. Ever.

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(409): View more from Texas

well he's currently spooning the coffee table

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(425): View more from Washington

Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK

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(716): View more from New York

He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.

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