Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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