like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
