we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
