Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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