I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
