oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
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