is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
