I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
