Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
