My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
