YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize