careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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