Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
