did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize