stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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