Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
