I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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