Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
