She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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