fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
