Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
