david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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